This is a great place to serve…”Yeah, but it’s early and is this really going to be a place that you fit?”

These are some incredibly creative people that are going to make me better…”Yeah, but what’s going to happen the first time you disagree with them?”

The worship times have felt deep…meaningful…intense…reflective…”Yeah, but is that just your perspective?”

The family is good, their happy, their excited….”yeah, but how much longer can it last?”

Then came Sunday. I don’t know why Sunday ended up being so significant. I mean…6 weeks in, it IS still early. Most pastors are telling me they didn’t feel right or at home until after the first year, sometimes longer. I’m a long way from that mark.

But Sunday was good. Part of it was Danny and Suzanne were here. They got to feel the vibe of Western Hills, meet the people, experience the service. When I introduced Danny in the second service, I barely got Pinecrest Community Church out of my service when the congregation burst out in applause. Completely spontaneous, very warm and heartfelt. It was another confirmation that what we did and how we (Western Hills, Pinecrest, all involved) did it was right, was God-honoring.

Part of it is our relentless pursuit of authenticity. Authenticity is not just being real for the sake of being real. If we only did that – would lead us to some bad places. In my less mature years (I’m not saying I am mature now…just more mature than I was…), I used ‘authenticity’ as an excuse for my immaturity. As in – “This is who I am, deal with it.” I’ve seen authenticity used as a weapon to hurt others. Not good. Not real authenticity either.

Real authenticity is being who you are, being real about who you are for the purpose of life change, spiritual transformation. No pretense, no guile – not to stay where I am but to move closer to Jesus. This understanding of authenticity is probably closer to James’ understanding of humility. We humble ourselves so that Jesus can ‘lift us up.’

I used to think this meant recognition. I don’t think it means that anymore. I think it means lifts us up to where Jesus is…in His character, His compassion, His mind. He makes us more like Him when we are humble (authentic) because He doesn’t have to break us.

At any rate…I’m seeing life change in our folks. Slowly…but surely. Walls are coming down and I could feel it on Sunday.

Last night we had our Christmas Party/Junk Food/Gift Exchange Extravaganza. It was a blast. Couple of highlights for me.

First, commissioning Toby. I got Toby a real shepherd’s crook as well as a copy of My Utmost For His Highest by Oswald Chambers. I know I surprised him. Told him that every shepherd needed a crook. (There’s a joke in there somewhere…) They use it for three main things, first is to guide the sheep. A nudge there, a nudge there and they’ll go there – as long as they know your voice. Second is to rescue sheep. Their necks fit in the crook perfectly. The third thing – support. A leaning staff, if you will.

Which led me to the devotional by Oswald Chambers. My mom gave me my first copy of this book. I wore it out. I still have it. I still read it. It’s been the second single most important resource of my life (next to the Bible).

This is pretty much what I wrote to Toby inside the cover:

Pastoring is hard. No one tells you how hard it is when you start. You figure that out along the way. One of those sleepless, tossing, turning nights when you realize no other job did this to you.

And you’re not alone.

The coolest part of the evening – our gift from the students. It’s a huge book with notes and letters from them, scattered in there are pictures. What a great gift.

In a moment of irony, our first youth group (12th Avenue) did the same thing – gave us a huge book of notes and pictures – that I still have and display in my office.

I was asked after the party – “How does it feel to be done with your last official duty as a student pastor?”

I didn’t really have an answer at the time. I was just enjoying the moment and the party.

This morning…it feels awesome.

Here’s why…it’s what we’re supposed to do. Toby is exactly the right guy for Pinecrest. We’re exactly the right family for Western Hills. It’s all good and right. So I’ll miss the relationships – sure.

But I can’t help but think God is pleased with this whole process – the decisions, how the decisions were made, and how it’s all playing out.

And that’s awesome.

We told the students and our ministry team leaders this past week. The slow leak is happening on Facebook. We’re telling the rest of the congregation this morning.

It wasn’t part of “The Plan” to leave Pinecrest, Parker, or this beautiful state. But someone famous once said “We make plans and God laughs.” Or maybe someone famous didn’t say it and it’s one of those quotes that really isn’t a quote, everyone just thinks it’s a quote.

The long journey of how we got to Western Hills is told here. We’ve experience polar opposite sets of emotions through this process but we’re confident this is God’s call.

There will be a lot of dinners, lunches, coffees, thank yous, tears and laughter in the next few weeks ahead.

Our last Sunday at Pinecrest will be December 28th (our 17 year wedding anniversary).

I honestly thought he was on drugs. My exact response was: “Thanks. I’ll pray about it. No.”

He mentioned how awesome it was to see a man of prayer in action. I’m pretty sure he was being sarcastic.

Then Croatia happened and changed everything. He gets to write the story, I don’t.

Danny P and I ended up having the same conversation after Croatia. I was in the middle of the same response when the Spirit just popped in and said…”Are we going to have to go back to Croatia?”

So I sent in my resume. I didn’t even update it. In fact, I almost forgot to tell Amy. We’re laying in bed talking about the day and I think I said something like – “Yeah, had lunch with my guys Downtown, blogged on the Broncos, and sent my resume to Danny Payne.”

“That’s great. Hope you enjoy seeing the kids on the weekends.”

Typically, not updating your resume is not a good idea. You generally want your resume to include things like a current address, phone number, and/or email address. Mine had none of those things. It did have this website. I wouldn’t recommend this course of action but I think it was my subconscious kicking in. Somehow the Search Team tracks me down, sends me a questionnaire.

I fill out the questionnaire. The whole time I’m thinking – “See God? Are you watching? I’m obeying. I’m passing this test of if I’d be WILLING to leave Pinecrest. Now leave me alone.”

I figured that would be the end of it. They’d read my answers, see the blog, see the earring, hear the messages online and that would pretty much kill any chance I had to be a lead pastor in a Baptist Church.

Then the phone rang. It was a Monday night during a football game. It was the Search Team wondering if they could fly us out for an interview.

I started repeating every thing the Search Team said to me so that Amy could keep up with the conversation. Neither one of us were ready for this. I’m officially wigged out at this point. They’ve been listening to the messages online, reading the blog. Want to meet face to face. I felt like I was in a three-way wrestling match between me, God, and Western Hills.

“I just can’t come to Topeka.”

It wasn’t a “No” but more like a “Not yet.” Instead we sent them a questionnaire to fill out for us.

What happened next was one of the many confirmations that God would give us over the next few months. They put that questionnaire in the hands of over 40 key leaders of the church. They returned to us every single original form. Not a doctored compilation document. Not a summary sheet. But every single sheet of paper from every single leader. Unvarnished. Raw. Authentic.

The next step was them meeting me at Oasis, a youthworkers conference in Emporia. They came and hung out with me that day, invited me up to lunch the next day. After two days of conversations, one of the Search Team guys drilled into me pretty good.

He said something along the lines of “You keep saying – ‘if this process continues.’ When are you going to realize we want you and you’re going to have to figure out what God is telling you?”

It was a statement that I hadn’t heard in over two years. What is God telling you to do? What is God telling you to do? I had a group of friends in LR that joked around what we needed was a bunch of parrots to put on people’s shoulders and that would be the only thing this parrot would say. “Brawkkkk, What is God telling you?” In times of hard decisions, we’d do the normal questions and prodding of each other then one of us would always say – Where’s the parrot? Are you listening to the Parrot?

Instead of flying us to Topeka, I wanted them to come to Parker. I wanted them to hang out with us at our church, experience a service, hang out with my staff team, my elders, and my youth volunteers. I wanted them to eat dinner at our house and enjoy a night just sitting around talking.

And they did all of that. It blew their minds to the access and openness we had here. It was painful for us. Two churches sat in my living room being the Church. Lots of questions and thoughts, lots of tears. Talked about everything and anything. They got to ask hard questions of the team about what I’m “really” like. WHBC got to taste what living in community is really about, how wonderful and painful it can be. We all got to hear God say ‘This is what I want’ with clarity, no doubts. It made things simpler…not necessarily easy.

We went out to Topeka last weekend to preach and meet the entire church. I was nervous and anxious going into Sunday morning. Not about my sermon. Not about the process. Would the larger congregation give a young guy with a passion for Jesus that just so happens to have a soul patch and an earring a chance? Search Team had months to get to know us. This congregation had less than one day.

Fear unfounded. It could not have gone any better. It felt like a homecoming of sorts. Kids loved it. We loved it. They loved us.

So we end one journey on December 28th, start another on the next Sunday.

Now you know the rest of the story…