You Know You’re From Colorado…

A good friend of mine sent this to me with this intro:

Grant,

Gene

The Gene in question was a life group member/elder/friend/mentor in all things handy when we lived in Parker. The day he was speaking of I never really blogged about or at least I can’t find it on this blog.

We were coming down the other side of the Tunnel when we hit ice, slid into the shoulder, missed the railing and the road post, came right back up on the road, waved to the people that we spun around, and kept driving to go skiing. No screaming, no stress, just another commute to the mountains.

Here’s what he sent to me:

A winter statistic in Colorado:

98% OF AMERICANS SCREAM BEFORE GOING IN THE DITCH ON A SLIPPERY ROAD. THE
OTHER 2% ARE FROM COLORADO AND THEY SAY, ‘HOLD MY Chai Tea AND WATCH THIS.

(For the record, Gene drinks Chai Tea, I drink Mochas. There’s a difference.)

You’re from Colorado if:

You’ll eat ice cream in the winter. (I do.)

It snows 5 inches and you don’t expect school to be canceled. (Check.)

You’ll wear flip flops every day of the year, regardless of temperature. (A bit extreme…shorts definitely.)

You have no accent at all, but can hear other people’s. And then you make fun of them.

‘Humid’ is over 25%. (Absolutely.)

Your sense of direction is: Toward the mountains and Away from the mountains.

You say ‘the interstate’ and everybody knows which one.

You think that May is a totally normal month for a blizzard.

You buy your flowers to set out on Mother’s day, but try and hold off planting them until just before Father’s day.

You grew up planning your Halloween costumes around your coat.

You know what the Continental Divide is.

You went to Casa-Bonita as a kid, and as an adult.

You’ve gone off-roading in a vehicle that was never intended for such activities.

You always know the elevation of where you are.

You wake up to a beautiful, 80 degree day and you wonder if it’s going to snow tomorrow.

You don’t care that some company renamed it, the Broncos still play at Mile High.

Every movie theater has military and student discounts.

You know what a ‘trust fund hippy’ is, and you know its natural habitat is Boulder .

You know you’re talking to a fellow Coloradoan when they call it Elitches, not Six Flags.

A bear on your front porch doesn’t bother you.

Your two favorite teams are the Broncos and whoever is beating the Raiders.

When people out East tell you they have mountains in their state too, you just laugh.

You go anywhere else on the planet and the air feels ‘sticky’ and you notice the sky is no longer blue.