Life Groups and Marriage

I’ve spent the last three weeks hanging out with leaders on Sunday nights. It’s our “Turbo Group” – a group of leaders who care enough about people to learn how to a Life Group (WH’s small groups). This Sunday will be the last night we hang out in a while and we’re starting a new sermon series the week after that called “I Want A New Marriage.” The timing of these two events isn’t coincidental.

One of the biggest issues facing families today isn’t finances. It’s the quality of their marriage. The financial crunch is often times just the issue that exposes the cracks. With the divorce rate hovering around 66% both inside the church and outside, we’re beyond the ‘it’s a problem’ stage. It’s a crisis. An epidemic. The walking wounded go beyond than just the kids that are caught in the crossfire. It goes to the wife who is ashamed to tell her friends that her marriage is crap. The husband who is to macho to ask for help. The divorcee who refuses to return to church because that institution was at best silent on the issue – at worst, the judgmental voice that condemned him to live life disconnected from God’s people.

I’m amazed at real, gritty, edgy, raw and pointed most conversations in scripture are about marriage and how most churches speak about marriage in the exact opposite manner. That won’t be the case with this new series. I’ve told our congregation every week now that this series has a PG-13 rating and now is a great time to experience our children’s ministry.

But I know the shelf-life on a good message is about 3 days. Meaning – showing up and listening to a few sermons on marriage isn’t really going to help a marriage anymore than watching football is going to get me in shape. This is where our Life Groups could be a huge piece of the marriage healing puzzle. That’s why the result of this Turbo Group is crucial for us. It’s going to provide some contexts for people to get help.

One of the best ways to improve our marriage is to hang out with people who do have great marriages. Watch, observe, interact, be vulnerable with them. Listen. Do life with them. Wisdom is better caught than taught. And that is what a Life Group is – a context to hang with others, be vulnerable, get help and hope.