Department of Motor Victims, II

*****Read Oxymoron Reality first****

So I tell her I need a replacement title. She can’t release it to me because there is a lien on the truck.

No there isn’t but could you release a title to the lien holder?

“Well if you have a lien release document from the lien holder, I could issue you the title.”

I say, “Well, I don’t have that with me right now, I had this morning but I am in a time crunch and the lien holder is also my insurance company who needs the title to complete the totalling of my truck. So if you could just mail it to them – it would save me a step.”

“I will have to ask my supervisor.”

“You’ll have to ask her what?”

“If we can mail the title to the lien holder.”

“So we have a title that no one can get – not the car owner or the lien holder?”

“We can release the title to only the lien holder.”

“Great, I will pay for the replacement title, mail it to the lien holder.”

“I will have to ask my supervisor if I can do that.”

At this point I am in utter, stunned silence. So is she. In the silence I realize the real penalty of losing a government document is NOT in the replacement fee. The penalty is in dealing with the people who work there to get a replacement document. I would gladly pay 10 times the amount of the fee, just to get it done quickly, effeciently, and correctly.

She is still just sitting there.

For an eternity.

And sits there.

“So, go ask your supervisor.”

“Oh yeah.”

The supervisor comes back and says with great confidence – “We will only release the title to the lien holder.”

“Great. We’ve covered that. Will you mail it to the lien holder?”

“If you fill this out and get them to sign here and here and here.” Plop.

4 page document to get a half-sheet of paper. No wonder our government in so much in the hole.

“You have got to be kidding.”

I left. I call Amy about 200 degrees Kelvin. “I need the lien release.”

Amy said – I have it right here. And guess what — the title is stapled to it.

Smooth, Grant….real smooth.